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When a breakup occurs, it’s usually not a joint decision. When you feel like the relationship can be reconciled and you ask, “Can I get my ex girlfriend back?”, the answer is often yes, if she sees the terms right.
- The important things first
Going through a breakup is a painful, stressful time. People say and do things that shouldn’t be said or done because of emotional overload. The first step to getting your ex girlfriend back is to reflect on your past behavior and apologize for those emotional outbursts. You need to be absolutely honest about your past behavior and really regret that it happened. It’s amazing how this can reduce stress between the two of you.
- Show her you still care
When trying to balance your relationship, you need to be very aware of your actions and the reactions they evoke. The chances of getting back together with your ex increase when you do the right things but decrease when you do the wrong things. Show her that you still care, but pay attention to her gestures and body language. If you notice her getting tense or angry, it’s time to use a different tactic.
You can try buying flowers, candy, or a card, but be aware of the reaction they evoke. Sometimes these gifts are not well received because anyone can run to the store and buy them. See if you can tell what would show her that you care. Try to put more effort into the gift. You could pick fresh flowers and arrange by yourself. What about buying a blank card? That way, you take the extra effort and write how you feel about her. This may be more appealing than a ready-made, generic verse that the greeting card companies came up with.
- Show her you’re thoughtful
When someone is considerate of your needs or feelings, you feel good. It seems to be a common notion that men are generally not thoughtful. So how many times have you done something thoughtful for your partner during your relationship? When you ask, “Help me balance my relationship,” being thoughtful can be a very positive step, and positive steps add up over time. Now, don’t expect things to change overnight just because you’re thoughtful. This is just a step to get back together.
Alright, now it’s time to honestly examine the level of thoughtfulness you’ve shown throughout your relationship. If you weren’t very thoughtful during the relationship, or at least weren’t very thoughtful right before the breakup, you should be subtle about thoughtful gestures. If it seems like you’re overly thoughtful right now, she might not think you’re really serious. Don’t be upset if this happens, just stay the course. You must be patient. Remember that you are thoughtful because it makes you feel good. It’s not an empty gesture just to get her back. This is about showing her how you honestly feel about her.
- What if I start dating other people?
As you can imagine, this question is not easy to answer. It depends on how much time has passed since the breakup and where you are in the process of reconciling your relationship. If the breakup was recent and your goal is to get your girlfriend back, it’s probably not the right time to start dating. This probably will NOT show your girlfriend that you want to get back together.
If it’s been a while since you broke up and your relationship is just beginning to reconcile, a casual date could be a harmless way to get her to reconsider her relationship with you. She may think that SHE should be your date.
- What if she meets up with someone else?
Well, I have to say, if your ex girlfriend is dating someone else and it’s more than just a casual relationship, it’s going to be a lot harder to get her back. In this case, the plan must be changed. Not only are you trying to get her back now, but she needs to see that she would be happier with you. Once again, be patient.
While your ex girlfriend might be dating someone else now, that doesn’t mean it’s game over for you. If getting your ex girlfriend back is very important to you, keep sending her a card every now and then. Just keep the message light. Wish her a nice weekend or hope she is doing well. This should be a message you’re sending to a friend, not an ex-lover. She might really appreciate your thoughtfulness.
- Have a goal and a plan
I’ve been in this situation, my friends, and it’s nerve-wracking. If you say or do the wrong thing, you will push them even further away. If you’re too aggressive and show her that you care, she’ll be upset. Remember this is a step by step process.
There are secrets to getting back together, but there are many steps along the way and many secrets to learn. If you’re asking, “Help me reconcile my relationship,” my best advice is to learn as much as you can about the reunion stages. The more you can learn from people who have successfully gone through the process, the better you can plan your own success story. To answer your question “can I get my ex girlfriend back?” The answer is often yes, provided you understand the stages of the process and have a step-by-step plan.
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